Who am I trying to fool? If it’s myself, it’s certainly not working. I wish there was some way that I could just start over. Just erase all my years from the moment I entered middle school, and start over. There would be so much that I would change. My habits, my friends, my thoughts. So much. I wonder if I worked harder in middle school instead of watching TV every afternoon for 2 hours, if I could be getting A’s right now in all my classes, if I would be struggling with precalc and chem as much right now. If it would change all that, I would change what I did in those years. I want to so badly. I want to be a different person so badly. To be in a different situation. I wonder what would happen to me, what I would do if I wasn’t born into such a privileged community, such an advanced city. What would I be like today if I was born in Texas? In the slums of China? Of course that would not be the ideal situation, but I am insanely curious.
